The Politically Correct Woodpecker

Lucy was sleeping, Clara and I were playing in the family room when I heard a knock, knock, knock. Clara went running to the front door, and I followed but, there was no one there.

"Gee Clara, we've been ...." but I realized that what had just happened to us should not be said.

When I was a child, we played a game... we would run up to a door, knock on it, and run away. We called it, "N" knocking.

We didn't mean it as a bad word, we didn't mean it as a slam to a persons skin color, it was just what the game was called. We were innocent, and clueless.

I can think of several phrases I grew up with that were not so nice. Such as, I grew up thinking that the "J" word meant "to negotiate". I had NO CLUE that it was a slam on a persons nationality. I never connected the two together. The English language has so many words that sounds like something else, but have no relation to each other. I was so humiliated the first time I used the word in front of my Jewish roommate. Her response was, "ouch." I felt like a total loser. In my defense, would I really have used that in front of her if I understood what I was saying?

So, as Clara and I stood at the door, and I couldn't find the words for what had happened, I became really sad.

• Sad that I grew up in a world where derogatory words were the norm.


• Sad that my family still uses some of these words and refuses to acknowledge that they are hurtful.


• Sad that I have no idea what to call this game now for my children.

On a happier note, turns out that our mystery knocker (maybe this is a good name for the game?) is our friendly neighborhood woodpecker. He usually hangs out on the upstairs window trim, but today he decided to knock at our fireplace. I guess Woody got the last laugh on us!

"ha ha ha haha, ha ha ha haha, hahahahaha"