Statistics - and other crap...

Our donor had her retrieval last Wednesday. We had 21 eggs retrieved! Only 11 of them fertilized... i was very disappointed in that number. We always had around 75% fertilization rate on our IVF cycles. At least I know that my hubby's sperms like my eggs better than my friends. That must say something about his fidelity :)

We went in for our transfer on Saturday. We found out that all 11 were growing great. They transferred 2 perfect 8 cells, and froze 3 more on day 3. The embryologist told us that the other 6 were growing so well that they wanted to wait until day 5 to freeze them. I was on cloud 9! I felt so positive that everything was going great.

I called today to find out how the day 5 freeze went, and the lab told me that there were none frozen on day 5 - i tried to get an explanation out of them, and the lab tech finally said - they must have arrested. So casual - all 6 of the embies arrested???? What the heck? What does that say for the 2 perfect ones that were transferred into me? Have they also arrested inside of me? Will I ever have a chance to have a child??

All the bad feelings of IVF are flooding back to me now - the over-analyzing of every little twitch and piece of information. Am i being careful enough? Am I resting enough? I hate infertility!!!

So - today is my last day off from work - tomorrow I head back to real life and try to stay sane until May 4th for the pregnancy test. May 4 is our 4 year anniversary. It's either going to be really good or really bad... I'm so ready for some good news - it's my turn!!!